April 2021’s Poem of the Month is meant to speak of Resilience in both the personal and the collective sense. Torn between a poem about personal resilience and a collective group resilience, I opted to introduce the subject from an angle about which I have some experience… personal resilience.

Mary Oliver’s words resonated with me… I mean, really resonated with me. I know that everything that has happened in my life has made me what I am today!! And it has taken resilience to learn and grow from those setbacks and experiences. To paraphrase a thought shared with me by my daughter, Nicole LaFollette (a wonderful poet): “Like everyone else, I am unique.”

It requires a unique form of resilience to overcome the unique setback, whether personal or collective. And, whatever the problem or setback — personal or collective — resilience to overcome and move forward is the responsibility to keep in mind… a personal or a collective responsibility if we are to move forward — either as an individual or as a society.

Remember this: Whatever the question, love is the answer.

RESILIENCE

“Someone I once loved gave me a box full of darkness.
It took me years to understand that it was a gift.”
Mary Oliver said those words. I can now relate.
Back then it was different. I was cast adrift.

“Whatever will I do?” “How can I go on?”
The questions… the questions! Would they ever stop?
Panic, then blaming, then a meltdown or two —
Till the light finally dawned one day in a coffee shop.

Writing my feelings — taking a good hard look,
I realized that any change was entirely up to me.
People around me who were happy in their lives
Were ones who had bounced back from adversity.

Resilience is knowing you’re the only one who has
The power and the responsibility to pick yourself up.
Resilience comes from having been given the chance
To work through problems — a bootstrap pull-up.

Charles Darwin was credited with the following statement
(Sharing it here might actually not be so strange.):
“It’s not the strongest nor the smartest of the species that survive,
But the ones who are most responsive to change.”

The bamboo that bends is stronger than the oak
Which can snap in its resistance to the storm.
Staying committed to your decisions, but flexible in your approach,
Your power is the power to actually transform!

Resilience is always within your reach
When troubles occur, and you are stymied.
You simply have to decide, and take charge there and then.
There’s light at the end of the tunnel as you proceed.

How to be resilient in the latter part of a pandemic
Is a question on the minds of many people today.
Individually, we’re struggling to maintain our balance,
With the hope of surviving another day.

Globally, the need for resilience is paramount.
We must focus on the positive things to change our course
(That are in our control, I hasten to add),
Moving always forward, using every resource.

With the availability of the Covid-19 vaccines increasing, and the states beginning to open up a bit, it occurred to me that it might be time to write a poem about what that might mean for all of us… how it might look.

What is the transition going to be like for you?

For me, I will probably be ever watchful and careful when out with friends or in public anywhere. And I will try to curb my judgment about how others are coping — all the while doing what I think is best for me. It will not be an instant healing from the trauma that this pandemic has brought. No, as the old adage states, “Time takes time.”

And, as the poem implies, there are no rule books for our ongoing behavior as we hopefully move further and further away from the pandemic. But there are opportunities for each of us to be kinder, more patient and loving with each other.

The wisdom, “Whatever the question, love is the answer,” fits this transition time perfectly.

RETURNING TO NORMAL… OR MOVING FORWARD

A.P. A. D. Hmmm… what does it mean?
Like with other aphorisms, it’s just one more to learn:
Anticipatory Post-pandemic Apprehension Disorder…
There! It’s named! So, what is the concern?

We’ve gotten used to social distancing and washing our hands.
We forget, and wear our masks even when we’re home alone!
We bump elbows, do air hugs — blow kisses, too.
It has become for us, our comfort zone.

Currently, science is winning over political suppositions;
There’s light at the end of the tunnel, at last.
People are lining up for vaccines.
Though a long time coming, relief is in the forecast.

In the rush to return to “normal” we need to decide
What parts of “normal” are worth rushing back to.
We have an opportunity to design a kinder world.
We can predict our future by creating it. It’s true!

(Besides, “normal” is an illusion;
It depends on where you lie.
What is “normal” for the spider
Is certain chaos for the fly!)

Look at it like this: a parable, if you will:
Suppose everybody went away on an extended trip.
In their absence the world moved and changed.
And, when they returned there was a new landing strip!

The end of the pandemic is finally in sight.
There will be a new set of rules, not like before.
But what are they? The mind is boggled a bit.
Transitions are tricky! It’s disconcerting…and more!

The trauma of change, the emotional upheaval,
Whether you’ve experienced the loss of loved ones, or not,
Has left its mark — has left us uncertain;
But now it is hopeful, and better by a long shot!

Take it easy as you go — take baby steps first!
It won’t be the same as it was before.
It’ll be different now, maybe even better.
Have fun as you go — as you continue to explore.

Be patient and kind with yourself, and with others.
Each one of us heals at a different rate.
Accept that others are dealing with stuff, too.
Believe it will get better, as the fears abate.

The February 2021 Poem of the Month, “Impermanence,' was selected after a lot of careful thought. I wanted a subject that reflected the situations that we are experiencing in this uncertain time.

2020 could certainly be looked upon as a nightmare, and I am sure to many people it was, and continues to be — loss of jobs, loss of loved ones, loss of the life as we knew it… perhaps the mood now can be labeled “uncertain,” as 2021 brings some hope… some guidance… the nightmare turning into a dream!

Changes in leadership… the decision to rely on science, not hearsay regarding the pandemic… the vaccines becoming more and more available… the efforts to open the schools (as the teachers are being vaccinated)… the jobs opening up again… all seem to be ranging in the positive zones!!!!!

Please enjoy “Impermanence” — this is its debut appearance, and will reappear in one of my three new books in 2021: MINDFULNESS, POSSIBILITIES and/or REFLECTIONS. Stay tuned!

As the poem states… indeed, life goes on, no matter how much we might want things to remain the same! That is our challenge… to be able to simply “go on” as life goes on around is.

IMPERMANENCE

Every change is a challenge to become who you are.
And hopefully, you will alway be changing.
When one stage of life gives way to another
Your habits will need rearranging.
How you spiritually navigate these important transitions
Will determine whether joy or despair is ranging.

There is never a permanent positive change.
Everything everywhere is impermanent.
Every beginning has an end; everything born will die,
…Moves so fast we’re left in bewilderment…
We’re not stagnant beings. Transience is a given.
Relax, live in the moment. Take enjoyment.

No man ever steps in the same river twice
It’s not the same river, keeps on flowing.
And it’s not the same man, for between the steps
Man is changing, the winds are blowing.
The only way to make sense out of the changes
Is to move with them, join the dance, go on growing.

If you decide to avoid change at all cost,
Be prepared for a life-changing shock!
Change will eventually find you in your hiding,
And it probably won’t even knock.
Robert Frost summed up all he learned about life
In three words: “It goes on.” (Tick Tock)